With You I Will Return
by Mini Nephthys
Summary: The progression of Gulcasa and Nessiah's relationship, beginning during Blaze Union and ending in Yggdra Unison.  Third genre is Drama, be forewarned.  Chapter 9: Nessiah finds his thoughts to be foolish.
1. element: water

"Hey, Nesshiah!" Sleip hiccuped.

Nessiah, who had been passing by, stopped in his tracks near her. "You needed something?"

"Yeah. Drink with me." She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him much closer.

He tugged, but her grip didn't loosen an inch. "That really isn't necessary."

"Course it's necessary! You need to looshen up a little. I bet you're wild when you're tipshy, or at least more honest with your feeeelings." She lifted her ever-present bottle to his lips.

He sighed. "...There are no feelings I've hidden that you need to bring out-"

She poured some beer into his open mouth as he spoke. "Much better. C'mon, it'll be fun."

"You are really not intending to give up, are you...?" Nessiah commented to himself. "Fine. But only for a short while."

* * *

Nessiah staggered into the room, earning strange looks from the gathered members of the strategy meeting. At Gulcasa's concerned look, he explained, "Sleip accosted me."

"Are you going to be all right?" Gulcasa asked, planning momentarily forgotten.

"It's only a bit of alcohol. I will be fine." Nessiah took his usual seat next to Gulcasa, and was unusually quiet during the meeting.

In fact, he fell asleep halfway through, which left Gulcasa the problem of what to do with him. Gently, he carried the mage back to his room, and tucked him under the blanket of his bed.

It was at that point that Nessiah woke up. "Gul...casa?" he murmured. "Why are you here...?"

"I'm taking care of you, obviously." Gulcasa sighed fondly. "Don't go drinking like this again, all right? Even if Sleip wants you to."

"You were worried..." Nessiah gave a slight smile. "I never had someone worry over me before... Thank you, Gulcasa."

"You don't have to thank me for something like that. You deserve to be worried over."

He laughed softly. "Many would disagree."


	2. element: fire

"Oi, Nessiah." Eudy grabbed his sleeve. "You're eating lunch with me today."

Nessiah turned to face her. "I usually spend this time with Gulcasa."

"I know. You're impossible to find without him these days," she grumbled.

"Is there something you need to say to me that the general can't hear?" he asked, as she let go of him.

"Of course!" Eudy smirked. "As repayment for letting me fire my cannons, I'll help you with your love troubles."

"You needn't thank me for doing something that benefited me-" The rest of her sentence caught up with him, and he turned a little pink. "...I don't have love troubles. I do not have a love life in general. You seem to be sorely mistaken in your presumptions."

"Reeeally? You don't ever wonder what it would be like to-"

"I am not going to listen to your fantasies; I am going to go eat with Gulcasa now," Nessiah huffed, striding away from her quickly.

"You're not helping your case!" she called out after him. "...And all I wanted was to help him. Hmmph. So much for magic-user solidarity."


	3. of ogres, trolls, and orcs

"I am curious, however." One of his necromancers finished off the last bandit as Nessiah turned to Gulcasa. "Why did you bring only me on this excursion?"

"Look around. Did we need more than two people to wipe out the bandit problem here?" Gulcasa asked, climbing off his steed now that the battle was over.

"I suppose not." Their units dispersed as Nessiah approached Gulcasa to speak to him alone. "But you could have brought any of a number of people. Aegina and Luciana were both available, and in terms of reliability, Baldus is your strongest ally. Why me?"

"Don't sell yourself short. You and your unit are more than strong enough to handle this. And besides, I'd rather spend the time with you instead of the twins or Baldus." Gulcasa looked surprised that it was even in discussion.

Nessiah smiled softly. "Is that so...? The feeling is certainly mutual."


	4. son of the bard

Nessiah waited quietly in the Flarewerk tavern. He'd traded his usual purple robes out for different ones, and his hood was drawn over his face. Like this, he could listen for the tides of change among the common people.

Today, however, did not seem to be producing anything useful. The townspeople seemed content to chatter about unimportant things - births, illnesses, the like.

"You know, I got to see the emperor in person yesterday," a female voice said conversationally.

Nessiah's ears perked up.

"Yeah?" This was a male voice. "Was he as impressive as he is the pictures?"

"More!" she answered brightly. "Except for one little moment..."

Nessiah listened carefully.

"When he was done giving his speech, he turned to General Nessiah - you know him, right?" she continued. "And the expression on his face was so warm that I couldn't be frightened at all of him any more."

Had Gulcasa really shown that kind of expression yesterday? Nessiah didn't remember seeing anything out of the ordinary.

"I'm glad Emperor Gulcasa has someone he cares that much about, it must be a hard job being emperor..." She trailed off.

Nessiah doubted the validity of this woman's claims. Gulcasa gave him no special treatment, at least not of that kind.

Still, the implication colored his cheeks, and he pulled his hood down further to hide it.


	5. element: earth

Baldus always paid attention to what was going on around him in Castle Bronquia. A good soldier had to be aware of changes in his surroundings.

Lately, most of what surrounded him was Gulcasa and Nessiah talking over whatever was relevant at the time. Taxes, riots, flooding. It didn't seem to matter much; Nessiah was capable of devising means of handling it, and on occasion Baldus and his troops would be sent out to deal with more military threats.

Still, just because it wasn't all that relevant to him, didn't mean that Baldus didn't notice the way that Nessiah's hands would brush against Gulcasa's unnecessarily or the way that Gulcasa's eyes would brighten the moment Nessiah entered the room.

Ah, young love. Any day now, they might even realize it.


	6. bewitched

It would have been useful, Nessiah supposed, to have complete vision surrounding him.

It also would have been an inefficient use of his magical energy. Besides, he had begun with sight only in front of him with some peripheral vision just like normal creatures, so it would have taken a fair amount of adjusting, with minimal benefit.

The problem with that was that he could get caught staring even without eyes.

He couldn't help it. It was natural for him to glance at the sound of someone entering the room, and when that person turned out to be Gulcasa returning from what should have been a long bath... there was no way to stop himself from taking in all of his form. He was still shirtless, water beading on his skin. As he asked someone else about soap, Nessiah watched him closely, completely ignoring the book he had been reading.

"Nessiah?"

Nessiah shook himself out of his reverie when Emilia spoke to him and turned to her. "Yes, Emilia?"

Emilia's grin made him wish that he'd kept looking at Gulcasa instead. "Nothing. I just wanted to find out if you'd actually hear me, instead of just staring at my brother~"


	7. burning city

Gulcasa was a busy man, being emperor, which made catching him doing nothing a rare occasion.

Nessiah waited in the doorway, not wishing to disturb Gulcasa from his important task of staring out the window. He'd had something to say, but seeing Gulcasa completely relaxed took priority, at least for the moment.

Eventually, Gulcasa turned to him. "Come over here."

Nessiah duly approached until he had a clear view of Flarewerk. During the middle of the day, the city was alive with people, workers and people just out and about.

"Before we came here, half of those people would have been hungry or scared to leave their homes," Gulcasa explained. "Every time I look outside, I feel like I'm doing something good here."

"Of course, Gulcasa," Nessiah answered, turning back to his emperor. "You've done so much for the country and city that you love."


	8. element: air

The closet door locked with a small click.

"...Remarkably blatant, isn't she," Nessiah commented. "Are you all right?"

Gulcasa shrugged as best he could in the small space. "I hear that it's a classic, or at least it's something Emilia would have heard of. I'm fine besides the coat that keeps hitting me in the face."

"My apologies. I can unlock this quickly enough." Nessiah started to turn to the door, but paused. "What are we going to say to her to forestall similar attempts?"

"I don't know why she keeps doing this, so I don't know." Gulcasa pushed a coat away. "Is it just for fun?"

Nessiah tilted his head a little. "I don't think that's all... Hm, given your history, it's natural for her to cling to family. If I were involved with you romantically, I would become family as well. Based on that, I believe I know what to say, although it's a difficult sentiment for me to express." After facing the door, he chanted a few words under his breath, and the lock clicked open again.

Emilia pouted as they came out. "You're not supposed to be able to do that."

"You should plan more carefully." Nessiah knelt to have his gaze level with Emilia's. "Regardless of whether or not Gulcasa and I-"

"I know what you said, silly. I was waiting here the whole time. That's not the real reason." She glanced at Gulcasa, then hugged Nessiah, the mischief fading from her eyes to be replaced by affection. "But I'm really glad you're family, too."


	9. fantasy

The word 'fantasize' is a more complicated one than it first appears. For example, many people in boring situations, like the guards Nessiah passed every day in the castle, fantasize about being at home with their wife and children instead. This is fantasy in the 'satisfying and pleasant' notion of the word. They will, after a time that seems infinitely longer than it actually is, return to their home, and may indeed have such a sweet reunion.

The other sense of the word involves 'extravagant and whimsical' ideas unlikely to come to pass, far more so than leaving guard duty to come back home. Nessiah fantasized about Gulcasa.

It was hard to narrow it down much more than that. Certainly some of those fantasies were sexual, as most people would assume. There were far more that were plainer. Being able to sleep near him and feel protected; being able to be honest with him, to tell him what he was and why he was here, and to be accepted even with him knowing that.

These thoughts were truly 'extravagant and whimsical' notions that had no business as anything but fantasy.


End file.
